I’m Back (Ish) :

Hi HI Y’all,

I guess I’m starting to step back into what I was doing and aiming to do. My medications were out for over two week and that plus school/family stress turned into an ugly pool of suffering. I mean I basically had my phone off as much as possible and tried to sleep through it as much as possible. BUT, my new medication refill has arrived and the dim light has returned at the end of the tunnel. I am reminded that I have wonderful and caring people in my life. I am reminded that everyone, including me, has a potential and the ability to grow. I am reminded that I too am alive and moving slowly towards a goal. That being said I was wondering what to do or talk about since rejoining the living and breathing society… I decided on D&D.

If you follow anything of mine I am pretty sure you know I love the games- D&D in particular. I was wondering if one day in the future I would add some sort of page with related content on it or have a cool podcast of the sort with it. However, I can’t just start that and jump into it/. Instead, I’d like to just introduce some of the characters I’ve used lately (some of their images and who drew them will be on my Instagram if you wish to see).

Current Main: Glasha – 1/2 Orc Druid with a Pet Spider named Muk

Recent One Shot: Paisley – Gnome Sorcerer that takes a bit of everything and is chaotic evil(ish)

Soon To Be 2nd Campaign Of The Season: Tecumseh – Feral High Elf Ranger with a pet Panther named Pandaros

Hardest Play: Mercy a.k.a Sheriff – a Tiefling warlock with a pair of twin pistols and a bounty on her head

The Begrudgingly Non-Magic Character: Layla Alyndra Van Morgoon – an Aasimar descendant noble fighter

The One Time Only: Zale – the Aarkocra Bard that couldn’t fly because flight rules get annoying…and so was role playing a bard

The Genderbend: Aurwun Kinstalked – the fallen aasimar monk with a sketchy past and a loner disposition

As you can see, I prefer playing non-humans and things with magic. Mostly because HELLO, IN FANTASY WE CAN FINALLY HAVE THIS! Also, I love to play Chaotic Neutral and Lawful Good annoys the SHITE out of me.

However, you can play whatever you want in D&D. That’s part of the beauty of it. If you are a seasoned player or someone interested in learning you can always hit me up here or on Twitter about playing a game. Seriously, I pretty much will always have time for D&D. It heals the soul.

OH, also…I updated the RWBY Fan Fic page. I promise to actually return, fix up and add to some of the older Fan Fiction. It isn’t fair for me to keep all of it trapped in my own head.

I.L. Knight

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Dnd Beyond Official Theme

Cold & Updates :

Hi Hi Y’all…

*cough cough*

Yea, I have been sick lately. The worst cold EVER. My voice has been up and down and my ability to function seems to fluctuate. BUT, I have pushed through to use all my energy to finish some content.

So, here we go with the updated Fan Fiction:

American Horror Story

Harry Potter

Star Trek

Maou-sama no Machizukuri! ~Saikyou no Danjon wa Kindai Toshi~

NEWLY ADDED:

1/2 Prince

That’s all for now. I promise to try and return to the outside world as soon as possible.

Oh, actually, also I made a practice bullet journal. People seem to really say it helps with organization so let’s make a practice one to see if it helps…

I.L. Knight

P.S, does anyone know how to add previous/next page options on here?

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Sing Me A Love Song – 1/2 Prince

The Grind :

Hi Hi Y’all,

I think I’ve met another situation where appreciation doesn’t equal the true understanding of emotional strength in a situation until one’s been in it before: the grind.

I grew up in a middle class family with typical crazy ass middle class problems. My biggest worries were always emotional and based on social dynamics. It’s the sort of crazy that seems particularly less of a problem for those of lower economic status. Where, food, shelter and education tend to be the more prominent concerns. I’m not going to sit here and lie and say I’m approaching that line. Mostly due to fear of a verbal smack down from a friend the first time my thoughts started to head in that direction.

What I will tell you is that for the first time I really am participating in needing to grind through to maintain a semblance of your former economic status.

Let me explain:

(1) Many people know the roots of many of my issues stem from family. This will not ever change. However, there is a way to relieve some of the stress in its most basic attachment, money dependency. If you cut strings that hold you dependent you can find room to breathe. The thought alone is nice, but it isn’t an immediate practical step for the majority kids in my possession. We were never taught to work, budget, or accept basic life style choices others have had to make.

(2) This is were the transition phase starts. Research on what you are exactly dependent on begins. Calculations are made and beautiful word documents created to try and summarize your life by numbers. From there you look at that scary truth and start to try and formulate a plan to afford to pay them. You get your first proper part time job. You start side hustles or free lance work here and there to get the few extra bits of cash. You even maybe get more than one credit card so you can do a new form of balancing act.

(3) Now, we’ve arrived at stage three. You’ve been really at this for awhile. You can sort of do the routine, but it isn’t perfect yet. Your life has become multiple part time jobs/freelancing, school and work comes first mentality, some of your old enjoyments are overpriced unnecessary goods and your new tittle has become minimum payment queen. Your natural 700s credit score is in the 600s because of choices you made to learn how to be an adult… Stage 3.

(4) This is what I mean when I say I am more than just appreciative towards those who are in the grind, because I am now in one as well. It doesn’t matter that my voice is cracked as hell, that my school assigned me a shit ton of work, that I wanted to write a book, or that I wanted to spend more time on myself. If it doesn’t fit in with the flow of the grind of the week it doesn’t fit in. It’s a no.

Yes, I am luckier than most. Yes, I probably shouldn’t ever say I have to live this life when I have people who will be there to catch me when I fall. HOWEVER, what I can say is that I am living a life that makes me my own person. I am living the life an adult. These tough decisions and annoying thought processes are now on my shoulders.

Living your life independent of attachments to others or of your own insecurities is a challenge. I think it is important to take a moment to realize all that you are doing to achieve the goal. You have to admit sometimes it sucks, your tired and you don’t want to do it. Then you need to be proud of yourself for still showing up for the fight.

That’s the grind…

Getting up over and over again.

Ain’t going to let anything stop me from standing up in the morning.

I.L. Knight

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Working Man Blues – Merle Haggard

Fan Fiction Updates :

Hi Hi Y’all!

We have massive flood of Fan Fiction updates for you~~~

First off we have our first Harry Potter RP updated to 39 chapters!

Our American Horror Story has reached 20 chapters!

AND our final one is the addition of Star Trek! 12 Chapters!!!

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So Much Work… Please Stop In :

Hi HI Y’all!

I have been giving up on the few precious hours of sleep I could possibly have to send you so  many updates this weekend and this upcoming week. SO MUCH. Just to give you the general rundown there was the addition of STARWARS and Soul Eater to the Fan Fiction page. Plus, DC Comics Outlaws was updated~~~ AND the super secret forced podcast I was made to do started this Saturday ( on the crowsnestco.blog ) For early access to any of these I shall remind you it’s just 1$ on a month on my patreon (https://www.patreon.com/ilknight )… Which you will notice had been updating like craaazy~ And will continue to do so as I have already ready to post stuff for Chronicles: Slaves of Desires and Confessions of a Teenage Poet which haven’t seen the light of day anywhere yet. So first access will be a thing for sure!

Please enjoy guys~

I.L. Knight

P.S. I’m actually working for a company that’s looking for bloggers, writers, illustrators and editors if y’all are looking. Just DM me~

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Busy Man – Billy Ray Cyrus

Patreon & More :

I’ve spent hours on the computer today. I wouldn’t be surprised if my eyes started bleeding from how much computer work I did… Most of it is on the back end BUT

Lordy, there has been so many updates on my Patreon….that isn’t even about if you love anymore. For one dollar you can literally see so much. So. go. please. see. it’s a dollar.

AND… Know somewhere in the back of your mind that COMING SOON =

The Crows Nest Co

&

Knights Publications

The Crows Nest Co is a site that will hold quite a few podcasts on it and the FUTURE MERCHANDISE OF SO MANY THINGS YOU WILL WANT TO BUY!

While Knights Publications is going to be the stop you will want to make if you intend to self publish!

I.L. Knight

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Money, Money, Money – Mamma Mia

Side Note – Where I’m At :

What a few days it’s been. There is so much I want to say, get off my chest. First off, I want to say I am thankful for my friends. To use one of my friends words: “I’ve been burned by a lot of people, and now I shy away from people, because ‘people are crazy’.” It’s a good description that sometimes you need to hear from someone else. These are the friends I am thankful for. Because, they’ll say something like this when they know my anti-depressants are starting ware off or just if I need to hear it.

And I’ve been needing to hear it.

For one, there’s this boy. This innocent, kind, naive adorable boy. He legitimately likes me and is eager to get to know me. But whether its genuine me or genuine insecurities that wonderfully kind boy so soon has become someone that is boring to me. And I stay with it, not wanting anything serious, but allowing this poor boy to care. It’s a new comfortable warmth. I like it. And I know that makes me a bad person, but I like having someone for the first time in my life that is like eager to get to know me and be there for me. So, I have to face that soon.

Then there’s my health. It’s like in the last two months I have a basically constant flare up. Like FUCK MAN. Every time I feel good life has to be like here’s your weekly reminder of pain, pain and more pain. I’m so sick of it. I feel like every time I start to move past my rage phase some flare up happens and I get angry all over again. It’s just not something I know how to move past. How am I supposed to survive with a body that literally hates itself and is attacking me. And my mind! I have to manage all the pain, lack of mobility, and anxiety it causes with being  manic-depressive already. I’ve fought my depressing cynical nature since I was a child. It’s always been a struggle for me to not be the sort of person who would be numb as the world ended up dying in flames. Now, I have to manage anxiety attacks and even more loathsome self image! I mean come on. How am I expected to be a fully functioning adult here. Scratch that, how am I expected to be a semi functioning human.

Will my service dog applications really help me as much as I hope it will!

Then there’s my mom. My lovely, but bat shit insane mother. All of her pain and insecurities are just thrust out at level 10 viciousness at me so much. It was so bad the last few days I actually shut down from a panic attack. I couldn’t move for over an hour. There was just shaking and panic. After it, I was even shut down the rest of the night because the stress caused a fever and more inflammation.  It’s like all my family issues, especially the ones with my mom, are being thrust at me like some world ending spear.

A semi alive state of either sleeping too much, or not sleeping at all.

Then there’s my new fond fleeting hope that returning to acupuncture once a week may help manage all of this extra pain. Of course, I have to deal with everyone telling me that a legitimate medical practice is equal to a shaman convincing you to enjoy shoving needles into yourself.

Gah! I’m also like so lonely and need to start working again, so I can afford to be at the school I don’t even want to be at. WHY DO I NOT HAVE MONEY. WHY IS THE WORLD SOOOOO…. ugh. You know, I really do work hard. I wish sometimes there was a better more immediate pay off.

Oh. Some good news! A new web novel series has been added to my site. It’s called World Conquering Dungeon! The Prologue is up, so check it out!

Thank Y’all for reading,

I.L. Knight

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These Times – SafetySuit

 

Sunday Announcement :

Hi Hi Y’all !!!

I have a bunch of news for you! First off I have Fan Fiction Updates ~~~

The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina

The Originals

Next, I have to shout out my girl, Lisa Stapleton. She is going to be the go to blogger for NANO 2018!

https://lisastapletonauthor.wordpress.com/

I will also be doing NANO 2018 and have a discord with a few other writers. It will be as close 24-hrs as possible for all the writers out there so be sure to join at this link below:

htt[s://discord.gg/Yudt66P

As for my other work, all the fun original goodies I am happy to announce the tentative schedule. Next Wednesday I will be releasing a teaser for my debut novella The Chronicles: A Tale of Shadow & Light.

AND that’s not all. Before next Wednesday, for those who keep their eyes on the site, will be the first to see updates on one of my web novel series.

Don’t forget to check out my weekly Sunday, 11am est Smite stream for dropped hints about whats coming in the week! AND PLEASE…

Tenguufeather

If you have a moment or two take the chance to hop on over to my Patreon and help a girl out.

I.L. Knight

Thanks for everything my little lovelies,

I.L. Knight

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Like A Vampire – Catrien Maxwell

 

 

What’s The Latest? :

Good News Y’all! I’ve started to figure things out. Shuffling between chronic illness, university woes, friendship explosions, family drama, writing desires and career ambitions will start to have a balance!!!

That’s right, balance!

Every Sunday morning I will be live on Twitch. You can find my stream at:

https://www.twitch.tv/tenguufeather

I will have Discord up as much as possible. The daily link is just below:

My Patreon will be updating and getting better and better… With fan fiction dedicated to fans becoming a thing!

https://www.patreon.com/ilknight

Of course, the classic way to reach me instantly with anything is at my Twitter:

https://twitter.com/nambit_kisa

Or, if you are willing to stick with me on a rough journey you can follow my instagram here:

https://www.instagram.com/nambit_kisa/?hl=en

You can also find updates on Web Novels and Fan Fictions Here:

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCvp3bu31_QfRzNiGzTlbEuw?view_as=subscriber

BUT THAT’S NOT ALL!

This month is all about fixing my personal streams, connections and works, BUT NEXT MONTH I am ecstatic to announce the first version of Knights Publications website will go live. If you are looking to be published and are tired or unsure of the publishing industry than this is the site for you. Knights Publications acts as an intermediary and guide to self publishing; meaning you control your work, you actually make a decent profit and no matter what it’s guaranteed publishing!

Even better news! If all goes well, at the end of next month Knights Publications and I will officially be launching our commitment campaign to a new charity in the works: The Zemel Foundation. The non-profit is being set up to help people gain access to all genres of literature.

So, please stop in! Exciting stuff will be happening. I promise y’all.

Also, to all those who have followed my blog, liked things, commented or generally sent me some help I want to thank you for everything. I have scheduled a sit down with someone who is willing to explain wordpress to me, so I will be able to return the favor real soon!

For starters, Knights Publications is currently looking for Authors, Editors, Illustrators and Interns! While, The Zemel Foundation is looking for Interns as well! Please email me if you are interested in any of those and I can pass the information along, so you will be on the site for the actual launch!

Thank y’all for being amazingly wonderful people,

I.L. Knight

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On Top Of The World – Imagine Dragons